Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The Crazy and the Weird

Carlos R. Romero, donkey rapist
Donkey rapist and other stories
By Robert A. Waters

In my hometown of Ocala, Florida, a man kept a miniature donkey for a concubine.  Yep, that’s right, Carlos R. Romero pled guilty to using a jackass named Doodle for sexual gratification.  The culprit seemed genuinely shocked that everyone else in the world thought his actions were weird and disgusting.  When police confiscated Romero’s donkey, he demanded that it be returned.  “I paid $500 for her,” he said. 

You wonder what someone was thinking when cops arrested a woman in 2013 for stealing a pack of cigarettes in 1991.  Brevard County sheriff’s deputies arrested Robin Hall, 41, after she returned to Port Canaveral from a cruise with her family.  She was placed in the slammer and will be held until Orange County Sheriff’s Office picks her up.  After her early brush with the law, Hall obtained a degree in architecture, and currently works for Pratt & Whitney, a jet design firm.  A quick search of unsolved cases in Brevard County reveals at least 38.  The obvious question is: wouldn’t a cop’s time be better spent trying to solve cold case murders instead of chasing down a cigarette thief 22 years after the fact?

In Portland, Oregon, Russell K. Gordon is accused of placing a hidden camera that resembled a pen to spy on a female co-worker.  He allegedly placed the video camera in a cup on the victim’s desk where he recorded her using a breast pump in the privacy of her office.  Noticing the “new” pen among her other writing utensils, the victim opened it and discovered the video recorder, along with an attached USB drive.  After Gordon was fired, cops arrested him and charged him with invasion of privacy.   

In Salem, Oregon, Marion County sheriff’s deputies arrested Kevin Dean Parrish on an aggravated battery charge after he allegedly grilled his grandfather's dog.  The Chihuahua mixed breed named Kudo “nipped” Parrish, according to deputies, and he placed it in the oven.  Turning up the heat to 350 degrees, the dog allegedly received massive burns to his paws.  Parrish’s father was so outraged he called police.  The pet is now being treated by a veterinarian and is expected to recover.

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